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Defeat :.

July 18, 2007

Sometimes, no matter how much we want something, no matter how much willing we are to fight for it, it just doesn’t work out the way we want to..

It’s not that we’re giving up, but when the cost is just too much for the victory, you have to cut your losses and live to fight another day…

It’s a harsh lesson I learned this week. And as reluctant as I am to close the chapter on this battle, no matter how much I want to stay in there and fight for what’s rightfully mine.. I can’t. I hate leaving this piece of unfinished business, especially since it’s a hollow victory to the winner. I know if I had the resources, I would have won this.. and come out with more than just battle scars, but a feeling of fulfilment and having saved someone from a life full of lies and empty shadows.

But I have to move on.. My life just can’t stop for one thing only, and I’ve put it almost on pause for as long as this battle has been taking.. It really makes me sad that “This is it.” and “That’s all of it.” but there’s nothing more I can do from here.

I know they say that ‘Love can move mountains,’ and even though my heart was completely in this.. it just wasn’t enough..

So I’ll just take my tired and wounded self.. and recuperate for awhile.. Give myself time to settle to the fact that I’ve done my best.. and the entire thing was just played unfairly, because had it been a fair contest.. I really would be the victor.

They say “All’s fair in love and war..” Those words have never been truer to me.

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