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Natural Sleep :.

August 23, 2007

Lately I’ve been in bed by 9pm, 11 tops. My head hits the pillow, and I’m out like a light. I am ever so grateful for it..

My body has just learned to sleep naturally again. Before I was on a constant string of sleeping pills, and even then, I would only get 4 or 5 hours a night, it was never enough..

I know it’s not much to be thankful for, but for someone who hasn’t been sleeping properly for months.. it is a big deal.. I used to toss and turn in my bed.. wishing, praying, anguishing over the smallest details, because my eyes refused to cooperate with my tired body. Crazy thoughts would be flying around in my head.. and the more I longed for sleep, the crazier they’d get.

It’s worse when you’re emotional and tired.. You just want to cry yourself to sleep.. but when you’ve cried your eyes out, and can’t sleep.. you just want to cry some more.. and where does that get you?

The only thing I miss is the dreams. I don’t dream as much or as vividly when I’m resting quite well.. Maybe that’s a good thing, not so many crazy thoughts.. I counter that though with some pretty nice thoughts and memories just as I’m drifting to sleep..

Like… making out in the back of a bar like a teenager.. The first flirt over some beers and baseball.. The first kiss.. The first ride.. Stuff like that… It keeps a girl warm and fuzzy on the inside when the company in those thoughts is far away and yonder.

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